Monday 27 September 2010

Fumaphobes at it again

I can't be bothered to get irate about a Norfolk council bringing in a policy to make smokers clock in and clock out when they take a fag break. I will, however, make a few points. Firstly, the idea that it will increase productivity is not very plausible. The real reason is that anti-smokers seethe with resentment when they see smokers enjoying something that they can't participate in, and with their holier-than-thou self-regard at full amplification, they don't notice their own down-time; their tea breaks, their internet surfing, their nail-filing, their prolonged discussions of X Factor or whatever. Anti-smokers are unwise to cast the first stone in such matters, because it might bounce back and crack them between the eyes.

Smoking breaks are often work related. If two smoking colleagues need to discuss something, then they are likely to combine it with a cigarette break, and kill two birds with one stone.

Besides, the only reason smokers go for fag breaks is because of the lily-white lung crowd forcing us away from our desks. So remember, nicotine-nazis, it's for your benefit we go outside, so as not to harm your delicate constitutions.

I expect this will not increase productivity. I suspect they'll not bother to measure in any case. The anti-smokers will still resent the smokers disappearing off to their conspiratorial conclave, but they'll no longer have any moral highground to preen themselves upon.

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