Vince Cable - you can fuck off too

Vince Cable to launch an offensive? That fucker is offensive; to the eye; to the ear; to the brain and to the beating heart of a freeborn English patriot, such as myself. Here's the news:

Vince Cable has vowed to launch a fresh offensive to keep Britain in the [hated] EU.

Mr Cable said: 'What the country needs is confidence we're still part of the [hated] EU

And what weapons will he be wheeling out to launch this offensive against his own country? Quake thee not, my dear patriot friends. Imagine a 50p rocket that got dropped accidently and unseen into a puddle and left outside for a couple of nights - that's about as much fire-power that Colonel Cable can muster. Specifically he goes with the old hand-shandy favourite; he states how much trade this nation has with the [hated] EU and tries to imply that all this would evaporate if we dared to reclaim our birthright sovereignty. He can't make the argument outright, which is essentially that the [hated] EU would declare a trade war, because then even the fluoridated head of a BBC agit-propster might have to dribble; 'hang on a mo... is that really likely?'

The answer is; No, of course not, Cable you fucking twat. Why would they? And if it were the case, it would be yet another reason to take back our independence as soon as possible. If they can't keep us with love, they sure as hell won't keep us with threats of violence.

So, Cable, if you're reading, please let me know when this offensive of yours is getting started, I'd hate to miss it.